always. being calm is a state of mind. being calm is a way of life. being calm is one of the hardest things to master in life. one might never reach a state of complete calmness, but one should always strive to reach this state. even when you are striving you will practice being more calm. to remain calm under all circumstances is to allow the events play out in life they way they are meant to be played out. to remain calm is to admit that your destiny is already planned and that to remain anything but calm is a mistake that you must try to correct. you must be calm in the storms of life. no matter what goes on around you, no matter how hopeless things can seem, no matter if you appear to be going nowhere, no matter if you doubt what you are doing, no matter if you don’t understand why things are happening or not happening the way you thought they would happen – you must remain calm. you must think about this all the time so that it becomes second nature. you must keep moving and you must remain calm while you keep moving through life. to be calm on the inside will allow you to appear calm on the outside. others will approach you and they will try to upset your state of being calm. this will be the main challenge to your efforts to remain calm. you must then be as calm as you can ever wish to be. you must take things in stride and trust the bigger picture that is in motion. it is easy to remain calm when you are alone in a room. the hard part is to remain calm when others come into your orbit. if you can remain calm when challenged by others, then you can get closer to the state of complete calmness. practice being calm and be ready for the challenges to come – because they will come. your state of being calm determines your whole direction in life.
Category: Happiness
quietness
nothing beats the quietness of night when the house starts to shut down for the evening – when the lights start to dim – when everyone starts to settle into their beds – when the dog is passed out on the floor. you walk around the house turning off the lights, putting on the dishwasher – feeling very peaceful about life – no worries at this time – you settle into your covers with your pillows fluffed – and you watch a few shows – and your mind drifts away from all the worries of tomorrow – when everything in your house is peaceful and you just see the glow of the appliances and the clocks in the kitchen. this is one of the best times of the day – the best times of life – you feel at ease – you feel comfortable in the quietness of the moment. life is ok for a moment. this is another one of life’s simple pleasures – these are the little things that matter – the only things that really matter.
enjoy status quo
we all want more – it is human nature. we continue to look to the future to solve our current problems. we think things will be better in the future. we fear change, but deep down we want change – we want change for the better. we know change always comes but we fight against it because we get comfortable in the current routine – the current status quo. but even though we fight change – we don’t actually embrace the status quo. we don’t often appreciate what we have right now. this is a big mistake. right now in your life many things are going well. these are things you take for granted and don’t appreciate. these are things you will only appreciate when they are gone. right now people you love are still alive. right now your family is doing ok. right now no one you love is in the hospital. right now you have friends that care for you. right now you are healthy. right now you are able to pay your bills. right now you can walk down the street and look at the birds in the trees. right now your status quo is good. yes, you have struggles and you look to the future to erase those struggles. but as you look ahead, don’t ignore what you have in the current status quo. enjoy the current status quo because it might be better than the future status quo.
patience is a state of mind
we are told our whole life to be patient and we never really understand what this means – especially when we are young. but as we get older, a strange thing happens – we naturally become more patient. the obvious reason is because we slow down a bit and we have more time to reflect and think before we speak or act. this process yields a more patient demeanor. and once we start to observe our own patient demeanor, we start to see new things in life. we start to see how life plays out if we are not always trying to be involved in every act of the play. we see how things can benefit us by not being involved in every conversation and every event in our lives. from the smallest parts of a conversation to the active engagement of a larger scale event – if we use a patient mind, we can often reap greater results. but this patient mind does not come quickly – it comes when your mind is ready. it is like a small epiphany one day when you start to realize the significance of patience in our lives. if you can recognize this importance, then you can evolve sooner – to create greater results in your life. like anything, you need to learn how to use patience – how to balance it with the other states of mind – how to manage it in every occasion. patience can be a very powerful tool once the art of it is mastered. you have to feel this state of mind on your own – it is not easily explained. we risk losing ourselves in the details if we try to further explain how patience works – so this is the deepest i will go in this analysis. but start to think about patience more – that can also help spur the process of developing a patient state of mind.
don’t sweat it
i am starting to learn that you can’t sweat most stuff in life. you can spend all of your time worrying about everything. you can worry about your job, your family, your friends, money, bills, making people happy, etc. but in the end all of this worrying does not matter. you can only do what you can do in life. yes, you can give 110% effort every day. yes, you can keep trying new ways to reach your goals. yes, you can never quit and never give up. you can do all of these things and you will do all of these things – because what else are you going to do – you don’t have a choice – and that is the great thing about life. by doing what you know is the right thing to do and by putting in maximum effort at whatever you do – then you don’t have to worry so much – because you will survive by doing these things and you will move forward – it is inevitable. but, will you succeed at everything you do when you put in maximum effort – no, you will not. if you know this to be true, then don’t worry all the time and don’t sweat it. you can get right back up and go after a new project/goal – and eventually, you will succeed – by sheer force of your efforts and your persistence – it is inevitable. so stay the course always, don’t worry and don’t sweat it.
conscious change
overall you are good. you do most things in moderation and this will prolong your life. but there are some things that you have done all your life and you have occasionally done these things in excess. in the past you experienced more events in excess -and as time has gone on, you have done these things less – but still in excess sometimes. they have been habits that have not killed you…yet. and who is to say that they will kill you earlier than if you never did them. but there are people around that you love that could be affected by these moments of excess – and this is why you must make a conscious change to stop doing these things in excess. yes, you only do them 2-3 times per year – but that is 2-3 times too many now. you are getting older and you must stop these bouts of excess. it is not good for you or the people around you. it will end badly if you do not stop. you need to think and say to yourself, I will make that conscious change – even if it means you will not experience these things anymore. force yourself to make the conscious change.
right now
everything is good right now. can you feel it? right now at this very moment while i type this and you read this, everything is good. all the people you know right now are alive and safe. they know you love them and you know they know you love them. you are aware of who you are, you have your senses, you have your family, you have your friends – right now you have all of that. no matter how much money you have or don’t have, no matter that all of your dreams have not been realized, no matter that you have lost loved ones, no matter that you have lost friends, no matter that you have not achieved all your work goals, no matter that you are not doing exactly what you want to do – you have right now, right this minute where everything is ok. in the next minute you could get a phone call and things could change from right now. so enjoy what you have right now – this could be as good as it gets and is it really that bad. right now is ok. if you are reading this, you are ok – you can read, you can think, you can relate to everything being ok right now. tomorrow, people you love could pass on – but right now they are still with us – enjoy them and enjoy right now – whether you are doing tedious work or lying on a beach – right now is ok. that is a good feeling.
be thankful
be thankful for the little things that you look forward to every day – and that you are excited for these things. this is what life is about – looking forward to the little things you do each day – having coffee, reading a book, going to work, listening to the radio, watching a show, having a beer – these are the things that keep us sane – that keep us from focusing on what we are going to do in the future. don’t think about what you can have one day – think about what you are enjoying today. think about the moment and be happy in that moment – this is what life is. life is not thinking about what you will have in the future – it is about what you have now – and being thankful for what you have now
content with patience
there is something that only comes with age – and that is wisdom. we all know this fact. but do we really know what it means. we think it means that we know more – which we certainly do know more. but do we use this wisdom to our benefit or to help steer our lives. unconsciously we do use wisdom to steer our lives. we stop doing things that are not smart to do. we start doing things that are smart to do. but to use wisdom in a conscious way is truly revolutionary and is a secret key to a better life. i found this concept ring true when I realized that I was suddenly in a waiting period of my life. i realized that all that talk about patience being a virtue was now coming to life for me. i wanted the next phase of my life to begin, but nothing was happening. i then realized that waiting and being patient is a big part of life. i realized that jumping too soon at something is not the right way to go. i realized that being patient was all part of the process of moving to your next phase in life. you need to be patient and you need to be content with patience – waiting for precisely the right moment to leave the “patience stage” and enter the next challenging phase of your life. when you realize that patience actually helps you along in life and helps you determine the right time to jump –then you have an edge on life –and then you have true wisdom.
a boring day
yes, this is something that hits everyone’s mind –and does so quite often as well. we have boring days –it is a fact. we all have these days, even if you are in full swing at work or at home – the day can still be boring. we call it boring because it seems to be a day that includes things we have done over and over – nothing new arises – at least nothing we think significant arises. this causes us to think that the day is a waste – that this day doesn’t mean anything in our lives. we don’t like to think about the idea of wasting a day, since every day gone is one step closer to the end. however, if you think about that boring day a little more –and you do the thinking on that boring day, you can see that the day does have significance. it has it in this way. you need to stop (which is easy on a boring day) –and you need to think about where you are and what you have in life at that moment. when you do that, you realize that the boring day is actually a reflection of a state of happiness in your life. you are bored because you have everything you need. and i mean this on a emotional and human side of things –rather than a materialistic side. you have the right people in your life and you have the right life on the personal side. realize this concept and you will accept a boring day more easily –and it will allow you to think that you have not wasted a day. however, you still want to accomplish more things in life and you don’t want to think that you wasted a day in your journey to have accomplishments. but, here again, you must realize that life is a marathon and is not dictated by every action in every single day. the key is to be patient and realize that boring days also are part of the journey to succeed in life. bottomline: don’t let boring days leave a lasting negative impression in your life and think about what you have more on those boring days.