patience is a state of mind

we are told our whole life to be patient and we never really understand what this means – especially when we are young.  but as we get older, a strange thing happens – we naturally become more patient.  the obvious reason is because we slow down a bit and we have more time to reflect and think before we speak or act.  this process yields a more patient demeanor.  and once we start to observe our own patient demeanor, we start to see new things in life.  we start to see how life plays out if we are not always trying to be involved in every act of the play.  we see how things can benefit us by not being involved in every conversation and every event in our lives.  from the smallest parts of a conversation to the active engagement of a larger scale event – if we use a patient mind, we can often reap greater results.  but this patient mind does not come quickly – it comes when your mind is ready.  it is like a small epiphany one day when you start to realize the significance of patience in our lives.  if you can recognize this importance, then you can evolve sooner – to create greater results in your life.  like anything, you need to learn how to use patience – how to balance it with the other states of mind – how to manage it in every occasion.  patience can be a very powerful tool once the art of it is mastered.  you have to feel this state of mind on your own – it is not easily explained.  we risk losing ourselves in the details if we try to further explain how patience works – so this is the deepest i will go in this analysis.  but start to think about patience more – that can also help spur the process of developing a patient state of mind.

ok to say no

this is a struggle we all go through in life.  our natural instinct is to say yes to everything because we don’t want to disappoint anyone – especially friends, family.  so when asked to do things or go somewhere – we say yes, yes, yes.  when you are young – it is ok to say yes because you don’t want to miss anything and you want to fit in.  but be cautious that you do not go too far down the peer pressure path and do things that could be dangerous.  as you get older, you still look to please – so you still say yes – but then you start to think that you don’t really want to do this or that – but you feel that if you say no, you might lose ground with that person and eventually harm the relationship.  however, you also start to realize that life is way too short to say yes to everything – and that time is running out – and that you need to start picking and choosing what you will do and who you will do it with – you want the choices to be based on this idea – do what YOU want to do – don’t say yes to please people.  so it is ok to say no – because you have to live for you and not anyone else.  if a person is offended because you said no, then they are not a true friend – and will not be there at the end of the day anyway.  it is ok to say no – and once you start saying no, then you will feel liberated – and it will become easier to say no more and more.  this applies mostly to friends and not family.  family is another animal – you need to do things even if you don’t want to – it is your family obligation and duty.


are everything.  they are the foundation of human interaction.  to have good manners is to be already ahead of the pack.  you must say thank you and you must say please.  you must be courteous and grateful.  you must be self-deprecating and you must be humble and you must be patient -and you must try to listen to others when they speak and you must ask questions to show your interest in others.  you must know the proper table manners and you must know the proper conversation manners.  you must not curse too much – but a little at the right time is ok.  you can get very far on just manners alone.  but the best way to get these manners is from your parents.  if they know what manners are all about and they enforce them over and over – then you will be good.  if you don’t learn manners from your parents, then you must first know that your manners are bad and then must do something about it.  self-awareness is key if you are behind in the manners area.  some people do get through life well without manners.  they push their way through life and people with manners sometimes step aside to let these bulls push through life – and oftentimes these bulls go far and reach great heights – and having manners have nothing to do with their success or station in life.  but, they know deep inside because they were never taught manners by their parents, they must just take what they can in life – they have no choice.  but if you are fortunate to have been taught manners in life, then you must pass the manners process down to the next generation so that civilized people can continue to inhabit the earth – so that we do not become a society run by bulls.  you will be even more ready to say good-bye if you know that you did it with class and left no door unopened and no thank left unsaid.