the beat down

we have all been beaten down by someone at some point in our lives.  this is not a physical beat down, but a mental, emotional beat down.  to be beaten down is to harass, subdue, or crush the spirit of – as defined in the dictionary.  these defined words are quite accurate.  people can crush your spirit, they can harass you, they can subdue you – they can make you not care as much as you normally would about a relationship, a task or a job.  we have all felt this way on the job.  your opinion doesn’t matter – just do what we say and we will crush your spirit in the meantime.  keep doing your job, but do it better because what you are doing is not enough.  why do we continue to take this beat down – because we need the money, we need the job, we are too lazy to look for another job, we think things will get better, we think the company will hit the big time one day and we will all benefit – but we just have to endure the beat down to get there.  many could not do what you do.  they would have walked out on day 2.  but you can take the beat down.  you have learned to accept it because you have another life outside of work and that life keeps you going – it keeps you happy – but the beat down can occasionally spill into your happy life, causing some problems – but not enough to affect it too much – not enough to quit.  you actually like what you are doing at work – but you must endure the beat down to stay there.  sometimes you want to quit – sometimes they want to fire you – but it doesn’t happen and you keep going – day after day, week after week, month after month – and then year after year.  you get used to it – they get used to you.  it becomes normal – but it is not normal.  you do learn how to cope better – you do learn how to be patient – you do learn how to be calm.  that is all good – but don’t let the beat down break your spirit – it can crush it but not break it.  you need to get through at the end  – stronger, wiser – and with the same zest for life.  you will endure the beat down as long as you are supposed to endure it – and not one day longer.  all results will be good because the next phase won’t have the beat down.  this is your time to endure the beat down – so suck it up, evolve, and move on.

no certainty

there is no certainty that you will be alive tomorrow.  we all know this, but we don’t think about this concept all the time.  we don’t dwell on the fact that we will all die at some point in the future.  and why would you dwell on this.  you wouldn’t and you shouldn’t.  but we are reminded on a regular basis that people die all of the time.  and as we grow older and as we know more people directly or indirectly – we will know more and more people who will die.  we wake up some days and are slapped in the face with another death of someone we know.  it is especially a shock if that person is younger.  if that person is a child or teenager or even in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s – it is a grave shock that we can barely comprehend.  we don’t know why this would happen or how it could happen – but it happens and it will never stop happening.  you might go awhile between deaths, but they will eventually come again.  all we can do is pray for the family affected and pray that it will not happen to your family.  but we ultimately have no control over when it will happen.  this is why we have to live for now.  we have to look long and hard at our loved ones.  we have to take it all in.  we have to try and pause the present.  we have to let things go.  we have to forgive.  we have to stop fighting.  we have to enjoy each other.  we have to do this and we have to do that.  we have to just be.  we have to move on and move forward.  we have to stop analyzing everything.  we have to be thankful for what we have and not be jealous of what others have.  we have to be comfortable in our own skin.  stop thinking so much and just live.  another death will come and you must think about living your life now – because one day someone will hear about your death.  live for what you have now.  that is all you have or will ever have.  now.

don’t react

you will come across many people in your life.  some will do things that you don’t agree with.  some will do things to show that they don’t like you.  don’t try to understand why people don’t like you.  don’t react to things that they do.  this is their problem, not your problem.  you want to say something to them.  you want to understand why they don’t like you.  you want to know what you did to them.  you want to clear things up.  for close friends – go clear it up.  but for acquaintances, don’t bother.  they are an acquaintance for a reason.  the immediate click or connection is not there yet or might not ever be there.  you have noticed that they are moving away from you.  could be something you did or said.  could be their first impression of you or their recent impression of you.  regardless – no need to react to them.  it is better not to say anything.  you have now learned that they are not right for you.  be a very casual acquaintance to them when you come in contact, as sometimes contact cannot be prevented.  so be casual and don’t react.  be happy that you now know which way things are going.  keep your info inside and don’t react.