don’t say 90%

don’t say 90% of what you are thinking.  thoughts come into your mind every second.  do this, do that, say this, say that.  you think so much that you have to learn not to blurt out your thoughts while you are eating – don’t talk with your mouth full.  you want to say something as soon as it comes into our mind so that you don’t forget what you just thought.  you even pause the tv to say something – knowing that it will be gone if you continue to watch.  you want to get your point across.  you want to talk all the time.  and most of us do talk all the time.  but at some point, you have to stop talking all the time.  as you get older, you just get tired of talking all the time.  this helps you stop talking all the time – getting older.  in fact, you must try to not say 90% of what you are thinking.  most of what you are thinking can be a negative against other people.  you do think positive thoughts as well, but we all think negative thoughts almost as much.  it is because you are used to a certain way, a certain person, a certain look, a certain everything.  so when you see something outside of your norm – you automatically go to the negative – why do they look like that, why do they talk like that, who do they think they are, etc.  it could even be when interacting with a loved one – you want to voice your opinion, but sometimes it can be a cruel opinion.  so stop before you speak and screen out 90% of what you about to say to someone.  this is evolving, this is growing wiser, this is how you stay ahead in life.  you might even listen more and you might show real interest in what other people have to say.

close your mouth sometimes

why do you continue to open your mouth in social settings and say stupid things.  this is a problem that we all face.  things just come out when in conversation and then you later think – why did i say that.  you might talk trash about another person or say something that will upset the person you are talking to.  you need to learn to keep your mouth closed and not say everything you are thinking.  i get it – you want to keep the conversation going.  you want to keep the conversation interesting – so you fill it up with things best left unsaid.  foot in mouth over and over.  it is very hard to learn how not to put your foot in your mouth.  but in casual conversation, just tow the line – take the high road – keep it clean – tell yourself over and over – don’t talk trash, don’t say what will hurt others, don’t gossip.  you need to constantly remind yourself – don’t say it, don’t say it, don’t say it.  you will feel better and you will be a better person.  this is one of the fundamental things in life that we all deal with – but others will start to evolve and will learn not to open their mouth all the time.  on the other hand – don’t be a staring mute with an air of superiority – that is actually worse.  so stay in the middle and learn to close your mouth sometimes.  do it, do it, do it!

don’t react

you will come across many people in your life.  some will do things that you don’t agree with.  some will do things to show that they don’t like you.  don’t try to understand why people don’t like you.  don’t react to things that they do.  this is their problem, not your problem.  you want to say something to them.  you want to understand why they don’t like you.  you want to know what you did to them.  you want to clear things up.  for close friends – go clear it up.  but for acquaintances, don’t bother.  they are an acquaintance for a reason.  the immediate click or connection is not there yet or might not ever be there.  you have noticed that they are moving away from you.  could be something you did or said.  could be their first impression of you or their recent impression of you.  regardless – no need to react to them.  it is better not to say anything.  you have now learned that they are not right for you.  be a very casual acquaintance to them when you come in contact, as sometimes contact cannot be prevented.  so be casual and don’t react.  be happy that you now know which way things are going.  keep your info inside and don’t react.

do these things

you don’t want to do something but you must.  you are asked to do these things for a reason.  these are challenges put in your way to overcome – it is as simple as that.  whether it is a social occasion or a work event – you must go ahead and do these things.  it is your destiny to do these things.  your destiny knows what you must do to grow.  you might be hesitant and start to reject the notion of doing this thing.  but you are meant to do this thing, to go to this event, to meet these people – so that you can evolve, expand, grow.  it is easy to say no.  it is easy to stay away.  it is easy to stay home. it is easy to be comfortable.  you must not always take the easy choice.  you must go ahead and do this thing.  it is because you do not want to do this thing, that this thing was put in your way to do.  that is the logic of life.  you don’t want to do it, so life makes you do it.  this fact is inevitable.  the only thing you have to decide is that you will do it.  so when you don’t want to do something – you will soon be faced with the opportunity to do this thing.  you will then need to choose to do this thing.  and when you choose to do this thing, go to this event, meet these people – you will then evolve.

don’t overthink it

you did it, you said it, you wrote it – this is what you thought at the time – it is done – it is over – you can’t change it – don’t overthink it.  you don’t know how the other person will perceive it.  you meant good.  stop analyzing every word.  stop going back in your mind over and over.  should you change this, should you go back and say this, should you call them, should you re-write what you wrote – just stop.  they are busy with their own lives and with their own problems.  they actually didn’t think twice about what you said, wrote, did – they are too consumed in their own minds, in their own lives.  they are not thinking about you – they are thinking about themselves.  they are in their own world with their own things going on.  they are walking down the street right now thinking about their life.  they are not thinking about you walking down the street.  they are not thinking where are you and what are you thinking.  they are at the center of their world and you are at the center of your world.  so don’t go back and rethink and overthink – don’t go back at all.  just say it, write it, do it – and move on because no one is overthinking about what you said, did or wrote – except you.  so don’t overthink it because it doesn’t matter.

not everyone

not everyone is going to like you.  not everyone wants to be your friend.  not everyone is going to talk to you.  not everyone is going to smile at you.  some will know right away that they don’t like you.  all of this will mess with your mind.  you will try to understand why someone doesn’t like you.  you will try to talk to them.  you will try to be their friend.  but they don’t want to be your friend.  this is life.  this is how things go.  this is reality.  this is something you must understand and move on.  you might struggle for years in your mind.  it will cause you to lose sleep.  it will cause you to stress out.  you have to get past this.  you have to understand that you don’t really want to be everyone’s friend.  you don’t really have to be involved with every event.  besides the fact that it is impossible to try and spend every moment of your life being friends with everyone you meet – it is not a healthy state of mind.  it is not the way things are supposed to be.  you are not supposed to be everyone’s friend.  you are not supposed to like everyone.  not everyone is supposed to like you.  but you are supposed to grow up one day and live with this fact and realize that it is a good thing that not everyone likes you and wants to be your friend.  be happy with the friends you have.  be happy with the people that have chosen you to be their friend.  stop looking at the other side, the other group – and look at what you have in front of you.  be nice to people but move on.  make this happen in your mind.  work on this mindset.

click

some people you click with and some people you don’t.  it is really that simple.  but we always try to figure out why we don’t click with someone and we try to click with them.  we try to reach out to them, we try to include them, we try to invite them, we try to talk to them, we try everything to click because we don’t want to believe that we don’t click with this person.  we want to be their friend.  we want to get along with them.  we do all of this because we come in contact with them through friends, relatives, etc.  we even blame ourselves for not clicking.  why don’t we click with this person.  what is wrong with me.  i should be nicer, i should try harder, i should talk to this person more.  but the reality is we will never click with this person.  you either click with people or you don’t.  and if you don’t, then move on.  stop trying, stop wasting your time – there is no click, there is no friendship.  it is not your fault.  it is not their fault.  it is no one’s fault.  you don’t click, move on.  get this in your head – you will not click with everyone – it is impossible.  just be cordial the next time you see them – don’t hold a grudge because you didn’t click – they did nothing wrong but be who they are – and they click with other people – but not you.  move on.

overwhelmed

as you get older, life moves faster.  and as life moves faster, more pressures build upon your shoulders.  this will inevitably cause you to feel overwhelmed.  this is natural – it happens to every single person in this world and most people go through their entire lives feeling this way at some level or another.  however, you do not need to feel this way at all.  but it will take a conscious decision in your mind not to feel this way.  you must understand that you have a destiny in this life -we all do.  you must understand that you will fulfill this destiny if you keep moving yourself forward at all times.  don’t give up and just keep moving forward –and you will continue down your path of individual destiny.  and because you know that you have a destiny to fulfill if you stay on your path, then you don’t need to worry about being overwhelmed.  just tell yourself that you need to be calm -that there is no sense in feeling overwhelmed -that you are on a path of destiny -so feeling overwhelmed doesn’t make any difference.  it is pointless to feel overwhelmed when you look at life this way.  you have a destiny and these feelings do not change that destiny.  take a breath when you feel overwhelmed and understand that these feelings have no bearing on your life or your destiny.

don’t fear the future

know that you can handle whatever the future has in store for you.  know that you have had down times in your life before and that you have recovered from them.  know that because of this, you will be able to handle problems in the future.  know that because you have pushed through uncertainty in the past –that this will help you push through uncertainty in the future.  and because of all of this, you do not have to fear the future.  you do not have to waste the present worrying about the future–because you will push through.  this should allow you to enjoy the moment more and feel good about what you are doing today –and feel good about where you are in your life at the moment.  it is a good moment because you don’t have to worry, you just have to live.  your mind will always push you to fear –but you must fight against it and move towards the positive.  an easy way to do this, is to look around and see what good you have in your life –and be grateful.  remember, you handled the past and you can handle the future the same way.  embrace the future and embrace change.

why i post

i post for 2 reasons:  to think through the main thoughts of life and better understand them  ……and more importantly for my girls.  this will be their guide to life when i die.